


Griffith's Friend.

by kikorime



Category: Berserk (Anime & Manga)
Genre: Angsty ending bc im sorry idk what to tell u, Bc berserk, Fix-It of Sorts, Fluff and Angst, M/M, Sad Ending, its berserk, some fluff but not that much bc, this came to me out of nowhere, this is just them talking it out
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-09-28
Updated: 2018-09-28
Packaged: 2019-07-18 15:36:20
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,689
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/16121522
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/kikorime/pseuds/kikorime
Summary: Griffith thinks about his relationship with Guts, and decides that he wants to talk to him about it.I'm still bad at summarizing stuff :"))





	Griffith's Friend.

**Author's Note:**

> Please enjoy my 2 in the morning writing uwu love you all LOTS <33333

Two men entered a tent, warm and comfortable compared to the cold environment outside. One of them, the leader and commander of the group band of hawks, set aside his boots and coat, undoing his caravat and taking a moment to stretch out sore muscles he didn't know bothered him until now. He waited for the other, his captain and subordinate, to do the same, and meanwhile lit up some candles to diminish the darkness consuming the tent.  
  
"Alright," the other said, speaking up for the firsr time since entering said place, "You going to tell me what the fuck is up with you? Or-" he sat down on a chair across the bed of his leader, closing his eyes and cracking his neck, "You gonna leave me to try and guess?"  
  
Griffith softly sighed, sitting down on his bed and looking at his companion for the first time. He had thought about how to go with this, rehearsing his speech in his head a thousand times. However, just like always when talking to Guts, his mind went blank, leaving him wordless infront of said man.  
  
"Guts," he spoke, thinking carefully on his next sentence, "I.. would like to.. talk about something. It has been on my mind for a while, and quite frankly, it frustrates me to no end." He sits straight up and places his hands on his lap, holding them tightly. "It's about us- or rather more specifically- you."  
  
"Mm," the other grumbled in response, "You could've just said that earlier, before everyone else started passing rumors." He relaxed a bit, his position slumping foward, relieved to know it wasn't about anything too bad. Or so he hoped. "Hate when that happens. Whats on your mind, then?" He crossed a leg on top of another, working on his jaw and looking directly at the other.   
  
The wind outside could be heard, whistling as some of it entered the tent, making the candle's flames waver. Griffith didn't know why, but he shivered slightly, maybe because of the cold, or maybe, for what he was about to confess.  
  
It was no secret, to anyone but the tall, dark skinned man, that Griffith held him at a position. A position that seemed to be higher than the rest, higher than any soldier or enemy, higher than any of his closest comrades like Judeau, Pippin, Rickert and even Casca, the one he used to think was his most special. He held him there, and to other eyes, saw that he treated him differently, preffered him most of the time, and- sometimes- even proclaimed them as friends.  
  
Friends..  
  
It was a word unfamiliar to the leader. In the past, he had people who resembled a "friend", however, they were discarded and stepped on once he deemed them unworthy. He had allies and people that he would use with kind gestures and charming words to climb to the top. None of them came close to what Guts was to him.  
  
It came to him, one day, when thinking of this soldier, that he was irreplacable. No one could take away the spot he earned, no one could come close to him. He truly was unique in the hawks eyes, and hearing everyone speak and spit out the words "friend", "special", "one of a kind" when reffering to him..  
  
He, too, started to believe as well.  
  
Melted wax slowly dripped from one of the candles, sliding down all the way until it reached the bottom where it joined more melted wax and mixed together to make a puddle. In all that time, Griffith stayed quiet, only opening his mouth when the flame of the candle started to dim out.  
  
"I know that you hate rumors. I don't quite like them, either," he shifted in bed, but still sat straight, "..but, maybe you have heard. The one where everyone proclaims you to be my favorite."  
  
At that, the other raised a brow, questioning him, "What about it? Jus' some things passes around." He stretched his arms and moved his legs a bit, getting tired from sitting down and soon wanting to move, "Unless.. you.. trying to say it ain't?" he stopped, and narrowed his eyes "What you getting at?"  
  
The other shivered again, but this time it was noticeable, and the tanned man started to get concerned, "Damn, you okay? You should've kept your coat, it's fuckin' freezin." He reached for the hawks' coat, "Here, put it on. It'll keep ya warm."  
  
The other put a hand in front, "I'm fine, thank you." He smiled, "However, if you are feeling cold, you may put it on. I give you permission." As if just noticing his surroundings, and the room he was in, he looked at the long turned off candles, and started to light them up again. "Continuing what I was saying, Guts," he spoke, sitting down on the bed again, hands now gently placed on his lap, "That very rumor, have you ever considered it as a fact, something that might hold truth in it, than simply some folk talk?"  
  
Guts, once holding the coat lightly on his arms with not knowing what to do with it, suddenly tightened his grip on it. "I.. not really.. I mean," he shifted in his seat, back straight up as he looked to the other man, "Me, being in that position? To where someone like me gets to be called your friend?" his eyes shifted momentarily, "..You trying to say, you actually agree? You feel that way. About me."  
  
Again, Griffith smiled, and gave Guts that unreadable look that sometimes annoyed him. "Well, I won't outright say they are false statements. If anything, the fact that they are close to accuracy made me think about how true they were." he let out a breath he didn't know he was keeping and let his eyes fall to the floor, "It surprised me at how much they made me realize. About us. About you."  
  
Guts blinked, hard. For some reason, he didn't expect honesty to come from this man. Or for this talk to lead into something deep into their supposed relationship. Something Guts still couldn't put together.  
  
"Have you ever showed me anything to make them true? It's not like you kissed my feet and gave me gold or some shit." he hanged the coat behind him, finally putting it somewhere besides being awkwardly in his arms.  
  
"What do you mean?" said Griffith, tilting his head to the side, "Are you saying that times I've let you inside my tent, this place no one other than you can come in, or the times I've shown you the whole of me, or the times where I've talked about the strangest to deepest things with you.. those times do not mean any sign of a bond? Of a friendship?"  
  
Guts blinked, again, but this time swallowed harder than when he closed his eyes. Had those things really meant a sign? If he thought about it more, maybe he could see that they perhaps were more than just normal talk or normal friendly gestures.  
  
But Guts was tired as fuck, and was pretty sure the cold had affected him, so he simply shrugged and got up. His legs, which were starting to fall asleep, woke up and started working as he flexed his body. "Could have some deeper meaning shit, but I need to go. My head is killing me and I'm damn sure I'm starting to get sick."  
  
As he got his stuff, Griffith got up and grabbed his coat, putting it on and following Guts to the flaps of the tent. "Would you like me to accompany you?"  
  
"Nah, s'fine. I ain't gonna dissapear on my way back," he smirked at the other, "Plus, you gotta sleep too, and it's fucking cold," he brought his find up, and pushed on Griffith's nose, "And your ass is also starting to get sick, aren't ya?"  
  
"I can take care of a little cold, Guts," he reached out and put his hand on the others, which made him flinch a bit. He smiled as be caressed the rough skin underneath his fingertips, almost as if soothing the other, "Thank you for listening to me, and being here. I have a lot more to say, honestly, but I am glad to know you are willing to have an open ear to my words."  
  
Guts felt the other put his other hand on his shoulder, sliding it down and back up, as if feeling for something, before squeezing the top of his arm. "I.. It's no big deal." he strugged of his hand off him and took away the hand being softly caressed by the other. "I'm going. See ya."  
  
And with that he left, leaving Griffith to stand there with his flaps open, only closing them when he saw Guts' figure retreat into the distance. He got more candles, and lit them up, hoping to warm up the atmosphere. He then worked on some paperwork and read the letters the king had sent him, still thinking about his talk with Guts.  
  
When going to sleep, and closing his eyes to rest, he gave a faint smile, fading into his dreams and escaping reality, until the next day came. In his dreams, he saw Guts, and only Guts. No one else was there but him, and he thought it was a good thing. He wanted to keep it that way.  
  
  
  
  
As Guts woke up the next morning, he thought if Griffith's actions yesterday meant something, just like the ones he had mentioned before. He then realized, that it wasn't his sickness giving him a headache, blocking out any thoughts or ideas attached to the argument of a friendship with his leader.  
  
Guts just didn't want to.  
  
That fear, of having someone close to you, only to leave and betray you, rose up and left a bitter taste in his mouth, one that made him twitch in disgust.  
  
He was scared. Terrified.  
  
So he ignored it, and got ready for the day. He silently hoped Griffith did not ask to speak in private again.

**Author's Note:**

> IM ACTUALLY KINDA PROUD OF THIS.  
> I feel like the rest of my stories are bleh, not my best BUT! I actually really really liked this one!!  
> Anyways hope u all liked it! ily allllll <33333


End file.
